this is not amusing

so i get home yesterday, only to find an envelope from the Boston Red Sox. I hate the Boston Red Sox. What's worse, here is the letter inside:



oh, and let's not forget the insert that came with the letter.



hillary's friend laura, who is my friend too and a huge red sox fan, swears that she did not do this.

that most likely leaves one of my lovely dartmouth "friends," unless the baseball universe is simply playing a cruel joke on me.

come forward and confess your misdeed, young fry of treachery.

Tales of An Amoeba

I truly hope to the bottom of my heart that none of you is ever as up-close and personal with a host of amoebae as I was a last week. I’ll spare you most of the gory details except to say that I proudly have a new feather in my cap. I have now officially puked out the window of a moving car.

There was one heart-warming aspect to this miserable trip to the clinic, however. Allow me to explain: Since the Bali bombings a few years ago, Indonesia has gone into hyper-security mode. Well, that’s what they claim anyway, but those of us who know better know that this is little more than a large-scale employment scheme. No fewer than 6 Indonesians guard the toll-style arm at the entrance to every building drop-off spot or parking garage in the city. One guard runs around the car with a giant dental mirror, one of them opens the hatch-back door to look around, a third raises the bar when you’re clear to pass through. The other 3 stand there taking themselves quite seriously but generally doing a whole lot of nothing.

So as we were approaching the ex-pat medical clinic with my head hanging out the window, the guards hollered loudly at my driver (who seemed quite concerned by the whole situation) and expediently waved us right through straight to the front door. One of the otherwise unoccupied guards managed to make himself useful by hollering at the motor bike that was about to come scooting around the side of the car. He was headed right toward my window to his potential detriment. God bless those security guards.

How do they know I had an amoeba causing the dysentery, you might wonder? Let’s just say that everything that goes in one side must come out the other…and they wanted me to collect it in a little container…twice.

Josh, I think your recent bad day might actually have been worse, but by a very narrow margin!

Even Dr's have those days

Anyone else out there have a 24 hour run like this?

Yesterday afternoon - Discover totally flat tire on my car at work
4:00 am - 30 minute visit with Reva
9:30 am - Call from daycare saying Reva got sick so we have to pick her up
11:00 am - Take car to shop; discover it can't be repaired and pay $100 for new tire
Noon to 8:00 - Reva gets sick approx. six times
5:00 - Jill, on the way to pick up child who's still at daycare is rear-ended (no injuries, but will require serious work on the van)

Nothing disastrous but one heck of a run of bad luck. Any of you messing with voodoo dolls by any chance?

And just a shade under a decade too, alright...

Well, it's hard to believe the day has finally come, but as of Friday your's truly is a PhD.

Of course, even after attaining such heights I still have to do things like leave work to get sick toddlers from daycare (which is why I'm home blogging in the middle of the day), but at least I'm doing it with a terminal degree.

I'll let you all know when the dissertation will be headed to your local bookstore (that is, if you happen to have a local bookstore that specializes in academic theology), and/or, when it is turned into a made for TV movie.

The quest for clearance.

You should all be so happy that our federal government works so hard for our national security.

With that being said, I need to ask Mazzucco and Papsdorf for their phone numbers...I need references to my patriotism and loyalty to my country.

The request stems from the fact that I lost all the phone numbers in my cell phone. But that is another story entirely.

Aren't you glad I'm not a secret agent.

I'm in for it...

You know how I grew up with 4 brothers and no sisters? While I have virtually no idea how to be a dad to a boy, I have even less of an idea how to be a dad to a girl. However, that's just what I'll be come early August. Devon and I are having a girl! And I'm on my way to the gun shop to buy a shotgun. After my dismal performance at Lincoln's bachelor party, I need to practice my aim so I can tag all those boys coming around some day. Especially the ones that are like Lincoln.

Beantown

We're heading to Boston for the weekend. Let us know if you'll be around.

Doug, I tried to email you and Anne but haven't heard back. Did you get it? Could we meet up on Saturday? I mentioned in the email we could do dinner on Sat, but we could do lunch, tea, drinks...really anything. No Saturday plans at this point (besides arriving at 1 am and sleeping for a while).

We could also meet up with you on Monday night, but that's a bit harder since we'll be Hanover for the day.

We're leaving the kids at home with grandparents. And, NSA, if you are watching, keep an eye on our house. We expect it'll be occupied a large amount of the time but with all those satellites you can probably tell when people are home. Also, if you're thinking of trying to steal anything (not that there's anything worth stealing), be aware we have a neighborhood watch -- and they really are watching!!

Homeland Security

"Have you ever been an officer or a member or made a contribution to an organization dedicated to the violent overthrow of the United States Government and which engages in illegal activities to that end, knowing that the organization engages in such activities with the specific intent to further such activities?"

This is the question I get asked as I strive to obtain Federal Security Clearance to be able to man-the-door at a security conference room that we have at my office.

Now really...even if I remotely happened to be Al-Qaeda...would I answer "yes"?

Americans are smart!

Adin's birthday

Yesterday was Adin's birthday. If you were thinking about her all day like I was, and missing her, I have an idea to make her next birthday a little better for each of us.
We should all host regional Adin's birthday parties. It's unlikely that she would be able to attend any or all of them, but at least the rest of the world could celebrate her birthday, even in her absence. We could hang up pictures of her, wear grass skirts and leis, and the like.

Another thought I have is that it is exceedingly unfair that Adin lives in Hawaii. Imagine how unfortunate for all those who don't get to hang out with her. They have to go through every day not only not seeing Adin Kawate, but also not living in Hawaii. It's like a double whammy.
Instead, Adin should live in somewhere harsh and cold like Saskatoon. Then people would say, "yeah, I'm stuck in frigid Saskatoon, but at least I get to see Adin Kawate." And others in Hawaii would say, "Well, I don't get to see Adin anymore, but at least I'm in Hawaii."

Just some thoughts.

Only in Delaware

can you be served rolls by Joe Biden at an annual farmers'/hunters' gathering called the Wild Game Dinner. The menu included bear, wild boar, goose salad, chopped deer, muskrat, bison...and rolls. I don't even know what a muskrat is, some kind of vile marsupial. Needless to say, Applebee's is looking pretty appetizing right now.

More importantly, Shannon, thank you for updating us on your Dad--we continue to think about and pray for you guys. Josh, I hope that your Dad is doing okay as well, and that the kids are back to wellness!

Hello Legionella

Hi all,

I have been out of touch for awhile, and am just getting reorganized. My Dad was admitted to the ICU 2 1/2 weeks ago with what turned out to be Legionnaire's disease, a very severe form of pneumonia. I went up to CT as soon as I found out, and just got home yesterday. He ended up spending 8 days in the ICU, and another 4 on a medical floor, and then came home on supplemental oxygen last Tuesday. It was a very scary, crazy, emotional experience, but he is now on the road to recovery. I stayed at his house while he was in the hospital, and then after he came home to help him get back on his feet. The kids were with a combination of Kevin, Kevin's parents, and me over the last few weeks, and have been remarkably good through the whole experience.

I am glad to be home, and to catch up on the blog posts, etc. I hope you are all doing well!

Shannon

As Clark Griswold put it

"Worse? How can it get any worse? Take a look around you [Jill] - we're at the threshold of Hell!"

In one of my low points as a parent I shouted the last part of that classic line as I pulled a Fasani and nearly put my fist through our bedroom door. This was following Reva's yacking up all over the bedroom right after I finished bathing the kids.

The Papsdorfs have been hit hard by a cold/flu virus something for many days now, and it is grim. I've cancelled four classes, skipped office hours, the kids are miserable, Jill can barely stand, and, to top it off, the one person who could typically help us through this, my Mom, can't, because my Dad has to go into the hospital tomorrow.

I just thought sharing my misery with you all might be a more productive, and less painful, form of catharsis.

That is all.

P.S. For those of you of a religious persuasion, your prayers would be appreciated.

IT help

Anyone know how to compress a movie? I'm trying to make a silly video fit into 100 MB.

Doesn't someone in the BLD know something about movies or computers?
I'm looking in the direction of Maurissa and Doug (that is, east northeast).

A word to the wise

If you ever find yourself at Kid Shelleen's in Wilmington, Delaware, DO NOT order the black bean burger.

It is most definitely NOT certified Angus beef.

Expensive diet pill?

Since I started taking Malerone, an antimalarial pill, I've lost 12 pounds. I lost 3 pounds before I left for India, almost 7 pounds in India, and ~ 3 more since I returned. I look much like the picture Jon posted from 14 years ago.

I go off the Malerone today, and I'm hoping to balloon back to my welterweight class. The other option is I have a tapeworm.